Compassionate communication -
learning to listen

“Compassionate communication...is a natural flow of acceptance based on a mutual giving from the heart.
It is our true nature to enjoy giving and receiving in a compassionate manner. So what stops us from experiencing connection with others and leads us to dysfunctional behaviour? In our modern culture we have developed habits of communication that limit our experience and trigger unconscious behaviour that can be destructive and alienating. Compassionate communication is learning to use our language in a new way thus encouraging a more rewarding and fulfilling experience when engaging in connection with others.
What do you value in another person in relation to communicating? Is it their ability to listen? Do they hold their body in an open and receptive manner? Can they accept the validity of your experience without contradicting or judging you? Are they able to to receive you and not withdraw in re-action if they are challenged by something you have said? Do you feel heard when you express your deepest truth? Take a moment to remember a situation where you have felt supported and heard. what do you notice, what qualities do you see in this interaction, what moves you to trust and open in this situation? What did you experience in yourself that help support this interaction?...”

Written by Marika Cominos and Colleen de Winton, this article continues on to discuss communication that blocks, speaking truthfully, expressing feelings accurately, needs and identifying what you value. There are also good listening tips and some guidance on emotional intelligence.